Mindful Psychology
Mindfulness is about learning to live in the moment and enjoy the present while living a balanced life.
An excerpt from Stephen Levine’s A Gradual Awakening. This Chapter is called The Wanting Mind.
…seeing the scope of my wantings showed me how deeply and subtly dissatisfaction created my personal world, and that seeing freed me from much grasping, from thinking that all my wants had to be satisfied, that i had to compulsively respond to everything that arose in my mind. I saw that things can be a certain way without needing to be acted on or judged or even pushed aside. They can simply be observed.
Gradually, seeing the unsatisfactory nature of much of the content of mind was opening a path of freedom. When we see that what we’re grasping is on fire, we stop reaching for it. Slowly, the mind is reconditioned to see what it is doing.
And as we discover there are many ways that desires cause dissatisfaction. There are for instance, things we only get once in a while, or which don’t stay for long. There are also things we get and after we get them we don’t want -which is really disconcerting.
…nothing can be permanently satisfy us because not only does the thing we want change, but our wants change too. Everything is changing all of the time. Can we thing of any pain in our life that was not caused by change? But when we deeply experience this flux we don’t recoil in fear of what might be coming but rather begin to open to how things are. We don’t get lost in fatalistic imaginings or ‘nothing matters’ nihilism, but instead recognize that everything matters equally.
…And we watch without judging ourselves for wanting. We don’t impatiently want to be rid of wanting. We simply observe it. Each moment of non-wanting is a moment of freedom. Mindfulness allows that non-wanting. Mindfulness allows addictive thinking and behaviors to change.
Let’s start with what Mindfulness is.
It is deliberately paying attention, being fully aware of what is happening both inside and outside yourself — in your body, heart, and mind — and outside of yourself in your environment.
Before bariatric surgery (weight loss surgery), clients are referred to me for a psychological evaluation as part of their pre-operative testing and requirements. Some of the other requirements are: a medical examination, a visit with a psychiatrist, blood work, visits with a dietician, and six months of a medically monitored weight loss program.
Recently, two women were referred to me for psychological evaluations prior to their weight loss surgery. They were friends. I was impressed by the changes that occurred during their months of preparation time. They became more mindful of their eating habits and more aware of the movement of their bodies while working out three times a week at the gym. They each lost 15 pounds in one month. It has been a pleasure to work with them and see them become more mindful of themselves and how to care for and treat their bodies with nutritious food, regular exercise, and relaxation.
Reading or walking as a way of developing stress coping skills (rather than eating) became part of their daily living. They are looking forward to their surgery knowing that continued mindfulness is necessary for success post-operative. Other addictive behaviors will emerge post-operative, if the person doesn’t make life style changes prior to and following surgery.
In 2008, I attended a Mindful Psychology Conference in San Diego. Below is a helpful mindful meditation that was shared by more than 800 people who attended. This meditation cultivates a loving heart and a collected, settled mind — which can decrease addictive or compulsive behaviors:
May I (or name others) be filled with loving kindness. (Awaken the heart)
May I feel safe from harm.
May I accept myself just as I am.
May I be peaceful and at ease.
May I be happy.
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